I am two days away from what feels like my first triathlon. I feel I have done the full circle: starting brand new to the sport 3 years ago; becoming obsessive with training and pushing myself to the point where I was severely over trained and believing the notion " the more I do, the better I will be;" to competing in every race possible to fulfil a childhood dream of competing against the best athletes in the world, while getting myself into massive amount of debt; then finally ending up where I started again: fresh, full of energy and incredibly motivated to be the best triathlete I can possibly be. However, the start of this circular journey is not the same as how it started, so many things have happened in my life in such a small amount of time, but patience and timing have been the key to starting fresh again. I feel so excited about competing in the elite wave in London on sunday morning and racing against some very good athletes. I am in very good shape at the moment and although I have not raced since April, my belief in my ability is just as strong as it always has been.
This whirlwind season has provided me with the opportunity to work on many different aspects of myself that I would not have been able to work on if I had not been through these experiences. The importance of listening to my body when it is in pain, tired and run down is paramount to consistent training and progression in the sport. This skill has been particularly important in getting the balance right between work and racing. I have had to eat some humble pie and realise I can not go on living on a few quid a day, scrapping by on a dream that at times seems impossible. Without any financial support, it very hard to be a professional athlete. I want to be a professional athlete, travel the world collecting ranking points and race the best guys out there, but for this to happen I have to be patient and keep motivated.
I am currently working as a barman in a 4 star hotel on the Loughborough University Campus. It is a really good job and very chilled. Most bar jobs can be stressful, but with this it is quite the opposite. I work approximately 20 hours a week and try and do another 20 hours of training on top of this. To make it through a week successfully I have to listen to how I am feeling, know when to push myself in training and know when to back off. Quietening my mind is essential to keep my energies up. I have constant debates with myself, for example, "I should be out on my bike," "I should be doing those track reps" etc, but I keep telling myself that this is the situation I am in and above all, I must flow with it.
I am very confident that turning professional is only a matter of time for me, but at the moment I will just have to ride the wave. With London Triathlon this weekend and, thanks to a very good friend of mine, I have the opportunity to race London Hyde Park on the Olympic Course the following weekend. Who knows what magic might happen....!!!